God’s Definition of Gender, Marriage, and Sex
Before we even dive into today's topic matter, there are some verses that I want to anchor our minds regarding the sovereignty of God.
Psalm 115:3 says, "Our God is in the heavens;
he does all that he pleases."
Isaiah 55:8 reminds us, "For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts."
Jeremiah 32:17 notes, "Ah, Lord God! It is you who have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm! Nothing is too hard for you."
John 1:3 says, "All things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made that was made."
Romans 11:36 declares, "For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen."
These truths remind believers that whatever God instituted in His Word was created by Him. It also pleases Him, regardless of our thoughts towards us. Secondly, these verses rightly elevate God's thoughts and ways above ours. Our opinions, feelings, and ideas do not change the truth we are looking at today, even when our culture asks us to abandon Scripture on the following topics. Lastly, these verses rightly title God as Creator of all, including His design outlined in the first chapters of Genesis.
So, without further ado, let's dive into the realities of God's design for marriage, gender, and sexuality found in Genesis's first chapters.
(Side note: If you haven't already, take a few minutes to read chapters one through three in Genesis. We will dissect parts of these passages to see God's original design, untainted by sin. However, viewing the entire backdrop as a whole will add greater context and clarity as you read this blog.)
GOD'S DESIGN FOR GENDER
In chapter one, the Creation account of a perfect Creator outlines the process of light, atmosphere, dry ground/seas/plants, sun/moon/stars, birds/sea creatures, and land animals/humans coming into existence following a day of rest.
On the sixth day, "God said, 'Let us make man in our image, after our likeness....So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them'" (Genesis 1:26, 27). The idea of gender first shows up here. We see two distinct genders, one biologically male from birth and one biologically female from birth.
Moving into Genesis 2, we get a fuller picture of gender within Adam and Eve's creation. The Bible declares that the Lord God formed Adam from a pile of dust, breathing life into him (Genesis 2:7). Then, the Lord said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him" (Genesis 2:18). God then created Eve by putting Adam into a deep sleep and removing one of his ribs (Genesis 2:21-22).
We see one apparent reality within the Creation account and Adam and Eve's creation account: God created two distinct yet complementary genders. Adam had no choice in his gender. Eve had no choice in Eve's gender. Before their birth, God decided to make them male and female. Therefore, their gender is the handiwork of a creative God who instituted sex assigned by the Lord's own choosing.
GOD'S DESIGN FOR MARRIAGE AND SEX
Genesis outlines God's view of gender while also defining marriage: a covenantal union between God's definition of one male and one female.
After creating Adam and Eve, Genesis 2:24 says, "Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and not ashamed."
Multiple places in Scripture remind us that men are to leave their mothers and fathers to cleave (or cling) to their wives. (Read Matthew 19:5, Mark 10:7, 1 Corinthians 6:16, Ephesians 5:31, Psalm 45:10, and 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 which all affirm this truth.) This truth is because the two are now one in flesh. They are joined together in body, mind, soul, and heart before a holy God. This union can only occur between one man and his wife under the safety and protection of marriage.
Additionally, in Genesis 1:28, God commanded Adam and Eve to 'Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it...'" Real talk? God's telling them to have sex to create babies! Procreation is one reason God designed sex, but that's not all. He gifted it as a sacred gift between a married man and woman for enjoyment.
Gender, marriage, and sex all run together, for they all flow from the original design God created them in. Not only did He invent these concepts, but He decided "God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good" (Genesis 1:31).
WHY WE NEED TO KNOW THESE TRUTHS
Soon after God created the world and man, Satan entered the scene. God's one command for Adam was not to eat fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil (Genesis 2:17). Satan came and asked Eve, "Did God actually say 'You shall not eat of any tree in the garden?" (Genesis 3:1). Her response was partially correct in that they were not to eat from this specific tree. However, she added something the Lord did not say: they weren't supposed to touch it!
Nevertheless, Eve saw that the tree was good, delightful, and desirable for wisdom, so she took some and ate it. Then, she offered some to her husband. This moment, otherwise known as the Fall of Man, entered sin into the world, causing separation between man and God. Praise God that while Adam and Eve were sealed out of the garden, God already knew His Son would come and redeem believers through His Son's death on the Cross! (Skip forward to Genesis 3:15, called the protevangelium or the first telling of the Gospel.)
Since then, Satan continues to prove that an old dog can't learn old tricks, for he has been up to the same lazy moves since this moment in the Garden of Eden. The world often questions: did God actually say this?! In doing so, they try to push the boundaries and commands God has established through His Word.
Most recently, our culture currently pushes back on God's very definition of gender. Voices proclaim that gender is a social construct that one can choose and change. Yet, the truth of Genesis declares God's design is binary, creating two genders alone. Male and female from birth are what God says is good.
Our culture says marriage can be between consenting parties, regardless of gender. Yet, the truth of Genesis declares God's design of marriage was solely between one male and one female, using His definition of gender. Marriage between a male and female from birth is what God says is good.
Likewise, our culture touts that sex can occur between any consenting party, regardless of gender or relationship status. Yet, the truth of Genesis declares God's design of sex is meant for married people, using His definition of one male and female from birth committed to one another through covenantal marriage. Sex between a married male and female from birth is what God says is good.
Friend, I know that in today's culture, saying the sentences above can get you labeled as an intolerant bigot who hates people. However, these definitions are what God says is true, good, and perfect. We see these doctrines set up before the Fall of Man, meaning these were God's intended design from the beginning.
CONCLUSION
Just like Eve, when we question what God says about these topics, we can easily buy the lie God is holding back from us. Why can't we decide which gender we want to be? Why can't we marry whomever we want? Why can't we have sex with whomever we want?
The truth comes down to this:
A powerful and mighty God chose your gender to bear His image in this world before He made the world. When we believe God is holding us back from being the opposite sex, marrying who we want, or having sex within marriage, we believe God made a mistake. And He certainly did not!
Like the verses we studied in the beginning, God does what pleases Him. His truth outlined in Scripture is for His glory and our good. We can question things till we are blue in the face and give in to every temptation on these topics. However, for the believer, when we use Scripture as the ultimate definition for gender, marriage, and sex outlined in Genesis and the totality of Scripture, freedom abounds. Therefore, we need to continually believe, affirm, and teach God's definition on these hot topic issues!
MEET THE AUTHOR
Megan Gover is the executive director of Minted Truth, an online Bible study resource of middle school and high school girls. When she’s not meeting with teen girls at a local coffee shop or dreaming up a new adventure, she enjoys cuddling with her Goldendoodle pup while at home in North Texas. Connect with her on Instagram!